Tuesday, April 19

Count on Me

I was thinking the other day how far I've come in two years but I can't take all the credit for my journey.  I couldn't have made it without my family and friends.  Then while driving home for easter I was listening to this song and just knew it had to be dedicated to all you wonderful people.  Even when I was at my craziest or saddest there was someone there for me and I will be eternally grateful for that and for not giving up on me.  I may still need a hand but I feel so much stronger and I want to remind you that I'm here for all of you. This also heralds a new name for the blog...don't worry the address will stay the same  and I'm open to suggestions so leave them in the comment field.
most especially.... THANK YOU

Monday, April 11

Long time no write

Okay I have no excuse for my long absence but it's also a good sign.  I'm getting out and connecting more with people in person, I'm living again and not hiding behind my keyboard.  The semester is done, just a few finals to write that I'm not feeling very stressed about.  On the academic front the big news is that I'll be speaking at my first professional conference.  I'll be presenting my paper on multilingualism at the Sask TESL/ TEAL Sask conference.  This is exciting for me and it's great for my future career path.

My family went for a family vacation on a cruise to the Caribbean.  Everyone went including my Grandma and it was really awesome.  We did the western caribbean so we saw: Grand Cayman Island, Honduras, and Mexico.  It was a 7 day cruise and I had a great blend of busy and relaxing time.  Our whole family went ashore in Grand Cayman and went to the beach together.  In Honduras I went to a cove and swam with the dolphins a lifelong dream of mine.  In Mexico I visited the Xcaret Park which was a mix of zoo, historical park, beach, and horticultural centre.  I really enjoyed the mix of experiences.  On ship I took in all the spa had to offer, swam in the pools, read my book, watched some shows and drank lots of yummy drinks.  Everyone had a great time, got some sun and just relaxed as a family.  It was perfect because you could do what you wanted all day and then we'd all get back together for supper.  The timing was a little hectic because I came back and had to finish 3 final projects in 3 days but I got it done so that's all that matters.

An important date passed while we were away, the 2 year anniversary of Armin's death.  It doesn't feel like it's been two years it feels like 2 millennium have passed since he died.  I'm a lot stronger emotionally than I was but some days I still reach to his side of the bed looking for him.   Last night was one of those nights,  I've been pretty sick this last weekend with a stomach bug and all I wanted was to be held by someone.  It's those little things I miss, the comfort of a touch, his smile, and the having someone next to you at night.  Most days I get by because I don't think about it much, it's like a dream that lingers at the edge of your consciousness.  Other days I close my eyes and try to escape back into that dream but like all dreams there's no way back.  Don't get me wrong I don't hate my life but I do miss the life I had.  Last night I cried and today I laughed and I guess that's what life is and what it ends up meaning.

Once my exam is over tomorrow I think it's time for some craft therapy.