I'm trying really hard today to not hate Christmas/New Years but I fear I'm losing the battle. Usually I'm all about this time of year but the last few have been tough. So in an effort to purge the negative I'm sharing the negative here and my idea to counter it. Maybe someone else is struggling, maybe you have an idea to share, I'd love to hear it. My goal is to not become the Grinch!
1. Financial Drain- Ok I like getting presents don't get me wrong but it is expensive on a single salary to purchase gifts for every member of my family. Plus since they all make like 10 times my salary and buy whatever they would like right up to Christmas day it's really hard to decide what to get them. It's depressing to save for months for Christmas, go shopping pick something small that you think they might like and then your bank account is empty. I don't know why I feel this way, maybe it's the empty bank account, maybe it's the fact that half the time I know the person didn't use the item, or maybe it's just that I feel like Christmas should mean more than presents. I'm just trying to remember it's not about how big the present is or even if they liked it but about that fact that we're together at Christmas.
2. Lack of things to do- So everyone I know is so busy with their families, christmas concerts for their kids, and all the extras Christmas brings they forget that if you don't have a husband and kids this time of year is sucky lonely. It also didn't help that I work a bunch of weekends and so I have to miss out on my family baking day since the weekend I am available didn't work for them. I especially am dreading New Years...it sucks....that's all...stay home alone, babysit so someone else can go out, be a third wheel at someone else's event....none of these options sound amazing. To counter this I made myself an activity advent calendar with a special thing to do each day....hopefully it helps. Doesn't solve the what to do New Years Eve thing but it helps.
3. What to write in the Christmas letter...seriously do you really want a page and a half about my cat's hilarious antics? How about my job? I love it but doubt anyone outside of my work cares about the awesome display I made. No I don't have cute kid photos....how about one of my plant goliath dressed up? Yeah I thought not...so this year I'm writing a gratitude letter...all the things I'm grateful for...watch for it later this month.
Ok that's my rant...I'm purging the negative and going to find some positive. Tomorrow is tree decorating (yep after 4 years I've finally found the spirit to put up the tree) so it's got to get better. My shopping is almost done (hahaha) so I don't have to face the malls except to people watch and I have a date with my nephew this week for some winter fun! Now to dry my tears, degrump and focus on the positive.